Self-Esteem

"We become what we think about all day long. The question is, what do you think about?"

Dr.Wayne Dyer

What is self-esteem? The dictionary defines it as "pride in one’s self", or "self-respect".

Jack Canfield, Author and co-creator of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series, refers to self esteem as "self-love".

We aren’t taught to love ourselves though, are we? As children we might be accused of bragging if we were caught boasting about our accomplishments. After all, nobody wants to be considered egotistical or arrogant, but a good dose of self-confidence is a necessary trait to believe in yourself and your dreams.

If we aren’t praised for our good deeds, or praise ourselves, the result is low self esteem. Research studies show that, other than money and sex, human beings crave recognition and praise the most.Who doesn’t like to be praised by their boss for a job well-done, or told by their spouse they look great?

All of us like to be praised and yet, when we are, what is often the immediate response? We don’t know how to accept it, especially compliments.As human beings we want to be praised, respected, adored and admired but are sometimes too afraid to ask for what we really want, especially women. We are specialists in "people pleasing" mode.This is where having good self esteem comes in.

If you love yourself first, you won’t ever find yourself in an abusive relationship, a dead-end job or in a financial mess. If you love yourself enough to say no to people’s demands on your time and energy, you will ultimately serve yourself and others to the best of your ability. It’s a win-win situation.How do you get good self-esteem I hear you ask?

First, make a list of everything you have accomplished. When you see what you can achieve actually written down on paper you will feel better about the possibility of what you want to accomplish.

Secondly, notice how you talk to yourself on a daily basis. We wouldn’t talk to our friends the way we talk to ourselves sometimes. If we did, we wouldn’t have any!Above all else, be kind to yourself.

Treat yourself with kindness and respect and others will do the same.